#PokemonGo

I’m playing Pokemon Go. Okay, Pokemon was kinda my little sisters generation, more than it was mine. I’ll admit too, that I mostly watched it for Team Rocket, and that even then, I mostly hoped that James would come flying out of the closet one day… I guess I was more into Digimon.

Recently, I made my boyfriend watch the two first seasons of Pokemon. I had no idea that the game as about to be launched. But we had a lot of fun watching them. And now, having just re-watched them, this game feels like coming home.

First of all, the concept is BRILLIANT. One day in the future, people will look back on Pokemon Go and know that this was where the future began. The game that created virtual reality, that took computer games into the real world, and blurred the lines for good.

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First of all, the game is designed to make people exercise. I have walked about 20 km a day, since I got it. No kidding. Walked and run. And my boyfriend, who never left the house unless he had to, has walked and run with me. My friend and her kids has been going on long walks, and there has been no “when are we going home, mom,” questions. No, “I’m tired, lets sit down,” nothing.

This game is bringing all the nerds outdoors, making us jump through hoops to hatch eggs, catch Pokemon, and beat up the other trainers.

Oh, there is war in my neighborhood. All hours of the day. And the night. Rain or sun. The gyms change color every hour.

The boyfriend and I joined Team Instinct, because we were told it was the smallest team, and we kind of wanted to fight. One thing we love, is to beat computer games, with the odds stacked against us. This is a computer game that takes us outside, at 4 am, in pouring rain, fighting like a team, to win the local pond.

That is another beautiful thing about it. Those who don’t play, have no idea. We have this parallel world, that only we can see. When we stand innocently beside a statue, looking at our phones, we see fighting, thunder and lightning.

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Others see a fountain, for instance.

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Or a statue one has walked by a thousand times.

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It is like bringing the world of fantasy into the real world. I cannot begin to describe how fantastic that is. As a fantasy writer, this is a dream come true for me. It is like living in a shadow world, that only those who play, know of. And those of us who play, are deeply invested. I swear, even at 4 am, in pouring rain, the war is on as soon as you step out of your front door.

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That is another brilliant thing about this game. It does NOTHING unless you walk or run. When you are at home, sitting on your ass, working, it does not contact you, it does not play. You can turn it on, but it will not interact with you. So it is not keeping you from working. But it will make you get up and go outside, when ever you have a moment.

And when you do, it’ll be waiting. I’ve met people with flashlights in the local forest, in the middle of the night. Places that are usually deserted, are now swarmed by people, day and night.

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Even our dying mid-city, is regaining life. We have had a lot of road work in midtown lately, forcing most  of the shops to close, because people didn’t bother to go there anymore. Now, with pokestops and gyms everywhere, we are coming back, just to stock up on pokeballs and potions. This game could potentially save the remaining shops in our midtown, along with saving our generation from obesity.

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Our friendly neighborhood cats have tons of fun following us around as well. Especially the nighttime hunting is something they can get behind.

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I actually get to know the world around me much more than I ever did before, because Pokemon is making me walk around in it.

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I have met a lot of people, shaking their heads at us, or posting mean stuff on social media. I will never understand that. First of all, the need to put someone down, for something that brings them happiness, is just… pathetic. Second, I truly believe that this kind of gaming is the future.

Pssssst, Hasbro, we need a My Little Pony game like this. I swear, if I could play with Rainbow Dash on my pasture without photoshop, I’d walk more than 20 km a day without blinking.

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Also, every computer nerd, world wide, is playing this game, walking, going outside. This game could save lives, making us exercise. I get how dangerous it is when people can’t stop playing in traffic, but truly that is hardly any worse than when people are texting and driving. That is nothing new. Not that that makes it okay. But I really don’t feel that this game gets enough credit for how truly brilliant it is.

I love too, how the other players are just awesome. We point each other to where the Pokemon are, disregarding team colors, and when we fight over gyms, there is NO hard feelings at all. No anger. Just playing the game, in real life, taking defeat with a smile, no matter how sneaky and underhanded the opponent may be.

Granted, it has a LOT of problems, mostly with the servers and the Pokemon Trainer Club. It is unstable or offline a lot, which is truly frustrating. But I keep coming back, just because… One day, there’ll be a Ponyta on my pasture… Oh, and the nearby gyms just turned blue… Bastards, logging in with Google when PTC is down. I’ll get ya…

Gotta run.

It is so on!

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Military Fighter Jets

I was on my pasture the other day, minding my own business, hosing down the horses because summer is back and it is impossible to do anything without dying from heat stroke these days.

While I was standing there, tangled up in the hose, five needy horses around me, all of them pushing to get closer, to be the one getting wet, it suddenly got dark. I swear, for a second, the light shifted. And while I looked up, the sound hit.

I don’t know if any of you have tried to have one of the military fighter jets fly over your head, so low you could have taken detailed pictures on a cell phone, but me and my babies, we tried that. Note that they fly faster than the speed of sound, so I had no warning whatsoever. It was just there. And then we were nearly knocked over by the sound.

I got to say, my babies did amazing. They all turned to me, and for a split second, I hesitated, and they all spooked. Then I regained my body language and they all calmed and stuck to me.

The sound lingered. For minutes. Long, long after the plane was gone. It was so loud, I would have let go of the hose to cover my ears, if I wasn’t trying to pretend that everything was normal for the benefit of my horses.

I was stunned. It is one thing for them to be training, but to fly so low, over a pasture?

What if I had been sitting on Apocalipse? Or one of my other youngsters? I could have been killed, and the pilot would have never known. I would have had no warning, no chance to calm my horse as the plane approached. No fighting chance, at all.

I was so shaken, that when the son of a bitch came back, clearly flying in circles, I did not think to turn on my camera and take pictures. I was too busy having all sorts of things flying through my head.

The horses did not spook the second time. Clearly, they trust me. But imagine if I had not been there? What if they had run out onto the road? What if they would have got hit by a car, because they ran through the fence in fear?

Flying that low over a pasture, is not only irresponsible, it is down right dangerous, not only to me and my horses, but the people, innocently driving on the roads.

And then it hit me. What those planes are for. What this guy was training for.

Looking up, seeing him in the distance, turning the plane upside down, rolling in the air, he looked like he was playing. Like he was having the time of his life. And isn’t that just sick?

Not only was he potentially putting civilians in danger, right here, in his own country, but what he was training for, was flying, faster than the speed of sound, to a forign country, to drop bombs on civilians.

As soon as that thought hit me, I felt sick. And angry. And so very, very small.

Imagine being those civilians. Imagine looking up as the sky darkens overhead, seeing a plane like that, knowing that this is it. This is how it all ends. There is no running, no taking cover, no fighting back. That plane holds your life in its hands and if it decides to drop a bomb on you, then you are dead.

Imagine.

Just imagine for a moment.

The very idea of this pilot, training for that, right above my head, is so repulsive to me, I don’t even have words for it. No, I do not support our troops. No, I will never support anyone who train for killing others. No. Just no. Not on my pasture.

I even called the cops when the guy came back today and asked them what I could do to make them train somewhere else. They told me that as much as they understand how dangerous it is with wild horses in traffic, the military can do whatever the fuck they want. It comes with being at war. Civilians, like me, loose all rights to safety. He advised me to train my horses to not spook over the sound of fighter jets.

Yeah, sure. I’ll go ahead and do that. No wait, I think I’ll just write about it on my blog instead, because I don’t have a plane in my back pocket, or anything else for that matter, that can break the sound barrier. I know, I must be a lousy horse trainer. I totally should have prepared for that… I mean, come on, who isn’t?!

The police man did tell me that he wasn’t aloud to fly that low though, buuuuuut, I’d have to prove it. Unless I could get someone at the flight center to disclose their records to me.

I am not out to get the pilot. I really am not. I am just terrified, and outraged that I live in a land where the military has unlimited powers to endanger civilians. I feel like someone should talk about this.

And truly, I feel that we should sell those bloody planes, not buy more. Watching it, I couldn’t help but kind of wish that he would crash. At least then, we would have a plane less, and a potential murderer less, (call them soldiers all you want, I don’t care, bombing civilians is murder in my book,) and a lot of innocent lives spared.

And then I instantly kicked myself for wishing this unnamed pilot harm. I am better than that. I should be better than that. I will be. All lives matter. I will keep telling myself that. Even those who willingly sign up for murdering others.

Imagine though. Seeing those planes come in. Watching those bombs fall. Never getting to hear the sound of them, leaving…

Sometimes, all you can do is weep for the human race.

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Silence

It’s been quiet since Life died. I’ve kept this blog silent for an entire week. I haven’t written a word on any of my books or scripts. Somehow, creativity seems wrong, when faced with a loss like this.
I’ve had a ton of friends tell me that they were sorry I lost my pet and every time someone called her that, I felt my soul die a little, because how could they ever understand? I know they mean well, but…

Life was not a pet.

Life was…. Life. She was our baby. She came to us; it was as if the hand of fate placed her on our door step, and we adopted her. She sat by our dinner table, on a chair, like a child, for three years. She slept between us in the bed, like a baby, for three years. She sat on our lap when we worked by the computer, for three years. She claimed our attention every second of every day, for three years. We carried her around on our arm, whenever we had to get up and go somewhere, because you didn’t just put Life down and ask her to be a cat, any more than you would put a child down, who really needed love and hugs.

She was special. She was perfect. And everything is just empty without her. I still try not to open the front door too much when I come home, for fear of hurting her. She tended to sleep behind the door, waiting for us. I still expect to hear her paws on the floor and feel her claws in my leg, if I did not pick her up quickly enough, whenever I sit down and turn on the computer.

I haven’t done that much. I have had days this week, for the first time ever, where I haven’t had it turned on at all. Even my smart phone has been off line and I’ve ignored any notifications that might have shown up.

A loss like this is not something that I can just walk away from. I need the world to stop spinning for a while. I need the silence that she left behind to be heard.

Even the things I used to get excited about, and stalk religiously, isn’t that interesting to me at the moment. I know that they started shooting SPN again, and that social media is probably drowning in news about season 12, but I don’t really care. I’ll watch it when it airs. Maybe.

Even going My Little Pony hunting at yard sales has a bitter taste to it at the moment. Life loved ponies. If I had known she would only get to be here for three years, she could have had all of mine. I don’t think there is a greater testament of love, for me.

Gishwhes is coming up, and I will have to let the world start spinning again though, at some point soon. I am not letting my team down. No matter how sick of the world I am at the moment.

The one thing that has saved us this week, has been Pokemon Go. It was launched in Denmark the day after Life died, and since then, we have walked about 10 km every single day, catching Pokemon by the local lakes, or jumping on a bus, going to the ocean to catch some water Pokemon.

And, once we got higher level, we have been locked in virtual, real life battles, with the other teams, day and night. We have two high school-like institutions near our house, and they have 4 gyms. I swear, those gyms change color ten times a day.

We have been running over there at 4 am, just to defend our gyms, or reclaim them when we lost them. The other trainers around are just as crazy, going on battle sprees in the middle of the night, clearly hoping that the enemy will be asleep.

It has been a fantastic way of getting lost in something that never had anything to do with Life at all. It takes us out of the house, away from the halls and rooms where she used to live, away from the garden she is buried in, and out fighting some battles we can actually win.

Also, the cats in the neighborhood think its awesome.

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They have been following us around like dogs, hunting with us. Kilometer after kilometer, they have run along, wondering what we were up to. Two, sometimes three or four of them.

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I guess that is a reason to smile again. And I know that to most of you, I must sound melodramatic and insane. Which kind of saddens me too. Because there are so many people out there who will never understand that to me, an animal, ANY animal, is an equal. I am vegan for the simple reason that torturing, and murdering someone, makes me sick. And losing my cat, is almost unbearable.

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So is watching the others sleep on her grave. I doubt that Monster knows that Life is buried here, but he sure looks just like I feel.

Left behind.

Alone.

Holding on to a memory that is bound to fade.

Hopefully, the silence in my head, and the hole in my heart, will fade too. Knowing me though, it won’t.

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But I’ll find a way to live with it, eventually. I always do. Somehow.

And now, I think I’ll go beat up that gym that just turned blue on my phone. Go team Instinct! It’s midnight…. There might be ghost Pokemon out… Bye, real world.

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Life

Three and a half years ago, I found this little kitten in my drive way. Starved, frozen, unable to walk, she lay in the bushes, hidden from the ice wind of winter in Denmark. All she could do was cry. And cry, she did. She cried for her life when I came home from the stable, parking my bike. I have never heard anyone cry like that. It was a desperate sound, a sound of an animal, whose body was dying, but whose spirit refused to accept that this was the end.

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Three and a half years ago, I picked her up, took her inside, and tried to feed her. She could not eat. She could not drink. When she tried, she threw it up.

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The boyfriend sat with her until she stopped freezing. We both thought she would die over night. None of us dared take her to the vet, afraid that they would just put her down. Somehow, there was this spark inside this cat, that convinced us to fight for her. Or, to let her fight.

That’s how she came to be named Life. She came to us, with nothing but her WILL to live. And that alone, brought her out of the cold and straight into our hearts.

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Life sat on Aston for weeks. She could not walk. She clawed her way around by her front legs, as her hind legs refused to carry her. Yet, she fought like no one I’ve ever seen fight before and in time, she regained mobility.

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Getting to know her, she had the biggest persona I’ve ever come across, contained in such a tiny body. She had so many faces, she could change expression in a heartbeat, and I swear she had an amazing sense of humor and a well developed sense of irony.

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Not to mention entitlement. And heaven knows, we enabled her. She had suffered more than enough. If anyone was entitled to live and be happy forever, it was Life.

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Yes, she slept with us, in our bed. Mostly on Aston’s pillow.

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Or, simply on Aston. Those two had the sweetest kind of symbioses.

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Not that she did not settle for me, when Aston was unavailable. But she was always his cat.

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And when we left the bed, she could stay forever like this.

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She was no doubt lonely when we weren’t home at first, but that was bettered a lot when I discovered her love for My Little Pony. That’s right. Life had her own collection.

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Majesty was her first pony and she never stopped loving her.

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She was a lot less lonely with Majesty. And she would steal my ponies any chance she got.

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Tinka Too, she stole, and since she wasn’t all that rare, I let her keep it.

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She had a remarkable eye for real My Little Ponies. She loved them, licked them, slept with them… But fakies. Oh, she bullied those.

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And then she found my Skywishes.

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I can easily say that I wasn’t a huge fan of that, but she loved it so much, I bought her a Skywishes of her own.

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I have a thousand pictures of Life and Skywishes.

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I could go on forever. Life had a lot of ponies in the end.

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She loved them all, but Shywishes was special.

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Now, her life wasn’t all ponies, although they mattered a great deal to her. She was a gangsta cat too.

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Always ready to steal anything shiny.

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And play X Wing with us.

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She sat in my lap when I wrote half of my books.

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Hell, she has written her own stories.

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She loved smartphones. Especially when they lit up.

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But she’d settle for just keeping it as her own and sleeping on it.

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She sat on Aston at all times. He learned to work with her on his arm. And as you can see, she was entitled.

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Nothing more important than sitting with the cat.

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Also, she played with her adoptive sister.

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Posed for the camera.

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Played like a crazy kitten.

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Looked adorable.

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Sat on her sister when they wanted the same box.

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Or just played in boxes. Because boxes are cool.

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She was perfect.

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Oh yeah, that’s a My Little Pony Generation 3 pillow. She stole it from me. It was hers very quickly.

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She ate everything, water melon included.

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She sat with me through all 11 seasons of Supernatural, even if she wasn’t always impressed.

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She slept on the keyboard, making it impossible to do any work at all.

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Or she sat up like a human, owning that computer.

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I know, I use past tense. Life suffered a stroke today. I can hardly believe she is gone.

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She was …. everything ….

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I haven’t cried like this, since Apollon died in 2012.

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The vet said that it was quite common for cats her age, to get a thrombosis like that.

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I have no words. She was three and a half years old. She was such a fighter and bam. Gone.

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Within an hour. No warning whatsoever. She just couldn’t breathe, out of nowhere. Her tongue turned blue and her legs failed her.

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We instantly took her to the vet, and he just shook his head. Nothing we could do at all.

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Nothing we could have done to prevent it either.

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Nothing. Just… Nothing…

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Emptiness.

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Just a new grave in the backyard. Guarded by the Applejack she never got.

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I always had a thing for Applejack. She never got one of those. She was buried with Skywishes though. So now they’ll be together forever.

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While all we have left is the rest of her pony collection.

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Three years of memories. And tears. Loads and loads of tears.

If anyone deserved to live, it was Life. She WANTED it more than anyone I’ve ever met. And she got to live for three years, against all odds. So in a way, she got a long life.

But then again. It was so short. So horribly, terribly short.

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Goodbye Life. I hope you got to be happy with us. I hope you felt loved. I hope you’ll never know how we miss you. How I don’t know how we are going to sleep tonight without you between us. On your pillow. Purring.

It is going to be so quiet.

I’ll stop writing now, before I drown my keyboard- her keyboard -in tears.

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Peaceful Training methods

I have a lot of cell phone pictures by now, that I am gonna bother you guys with. It’s kinda horrible, having a smartphone. You always have a camera at hand, so you never think to bring the Canon Eos anymore, which leaves you with a lot of pictures of lousy quality.

Anyway, let’s start with Apocalipse and Tardis.

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That’s right, Tardis actually have a friend now. Someone she likes to hang with. I am so proud of both of them. Mostly of Apocalipse for never giving up on her.

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Look at that… Happy Tardis, with a buddy. I feel like I’ve waited three years for that. I am pretty sure Apocalipse feels the same way.

Saleem and Ablaze has been playing a lot lately. Apocalipse joins them sometimes.

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Mostly he plays with Saleem. He does think that Ablaze is too violent.

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He is kind of right. Amazingly enough, Saleem handles Ablaze perfectly and is not spooked by him.

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He even plays with Marble now.

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And, take a closer look, please. He might still be headshaking when he is playing, but… He is not off beat! He actually raises his back and carries himself! I am jumping for joy to see him like this. So here is a video as well. Just because. Saleem usually cantered on four stiff legs, “bunny hop” style. Now, he actually canters.

The difference? He is barefoot now. He is starting to trust his body. This new confidence in him is amazing.

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Okay, so sometimes he does lose a beat. But now, it doesn’t stop him from playing, or discourage him in any way.

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I am so happy to see him like this. And that foal, well, isn’t he just a bundle of joy?

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Yeah, he was always good at that. Apocalipse too. That is clearly something that my boys has been born with. Who needs four legs when you can walk on two?

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Oh yeah and let us not forget; Marble is playing! Like, for real. Ablaze was never scared of her, but Saleem and Apocalipse never liked playing with her, because she kicks when she is excited. I love that picture. Saleem is trotting, looking AWESOME for once, Ablaze is rearing up, like he has done since he was a day old, and Marble is jumping straight up into the air, ready to explode and kill anything near her. That’s my kiddos. Also, look at this.

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Yes, she is a thoroughbred. You gotta be darn fast to catch her on camera. But with all the leg issues she has had, this is fantastic. She is actually running, top speed, on her own accord. That’s gotta mean that her future is looking brighter, right?

The future of my phone, however, is looking kind of bleak. It’s a Nokia windows phone, which means that it does not support PokemonGo, which of course, is completely unacceptable. Other than that, it keeps crashing. Turning on the flash light in my pocket, (way to drain my battery,) turning off at random, refusing to open Instagram every time someone uploads a video, and lo and behold, crashing the camera when I am using it. Like in this video.

Still, Ablaze is learning this no contact game Saleem and Apocalipse are so good at. I guess  I know now, who taught Apocalipse that. My Saleem, training yet another foal. I am so proud of him.

He is so gentle and so sweet and still he manages to wrap the others around his hoof. And he is doing so, peacefully, while letting them play. That is one great leader. He sure is something to aspire to. I know that I never get tired of studying this horse and his training methods. Even if my bloody phone does.

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Cows!

We have cows on the other side of our fence at my stable. Like, the cutest little cows. I have been watching them for years now, arriving at the conclusion that one day, when I get a huge farm, I totally want a cow. Right now, I don’t really have the space for a cow. Or two. Gotta have two, right? Because, what if the horses are evil to them? They should have each other…

Anyway. I was by my friends farm the other day. She has 4 Dexter cows. Which means that they are small, black, and kinda wild. Just. My. Kinda. Cows. And to ad insult to injury, they are for sale.

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I mean look at those faces. How are they not adorable? How anyone eats them is beyond me… I just wanna touch them, interact with them, learn their body language… I mean, look at that face.

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They were curious, which is always a great sign. When you work with horses, curiosity is the most important thing. If it doesn’t have that, it is uphill. They were very shy though, and spooked very easily. My friend was kinda shaking her head at them, because all winter they are all friendly and cuddly, and as soon as summer comes and they run free on the pasture, they turn into wild animals.

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And yes, I instantly fell into using horsemanship, turning my side to them, flexing one of my legs, lowering my head… The two youngest fell for it. How awesome is that? They are buying horse- language? I soooooooo want a cow! The things I could learn….!

Also, they spooked easily. It felt like being back, next to my old boy, Poseidon. The second I forgot about my body language, they jumped. I have really been slacking off lately, with the trusting and friendly horses I have now. These cows reminded me of what I used to be. What I was GOOD at, once upon a time.

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Yes, the two old ones joined us in the end. Chuck, they are so cute. Why don’t I have a huge pasture? They would be so great with the kiddos…

I know. I haven’t really had the energy to train my horses lately, and now I want a cow? Reality check, V. But…

No. I need a bigger pasture. I can’t buy these guys. But one day…. One day…

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I’ll Fly

I have to share this song. Rainbow Dash is always the one I identify with mostly when I watch My Little Pony, and well, here is why.

Basically her pet turtle, Tank, is going into hibernation because of the winter, and Dashie is ready to do anything to keep him with her. She’ll stop winter, sabotage the other pegasi… She’ll stop at nothing.

This song is just as sweet as it is heartbreaking. I know just how she feels. And how she is fighting a losing battle.

This is a children’s show, (somewhat,) so Tank couldn’t die, but she sure is fighting in this episode, just as hard as I fought when Apollon was dying. She cries just as much too.

This is why I love My Little Pony. They always manage to touch some nerve, especially if you are watching as an adult.

“I’ll fly until the end of the sky, so I’ll be the one who doesn’t have to say goodbye”

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I swear guys. I would have stopped winter for each and every one of you, if I could have. Sometimes you have to accept that there are things you cannot change. Sometimes you have to say goodbye. You can do so gracefully, or you can go down kicking and screaming, fighting tooth and nail, all the way. I’m a Rainbow Dash.

When she looses in the end, and Tank buries  himself, she stays and reads to him, even if he can’t hear her anymore. I can’t even… I’ve been there. So many times.

Wow, this turned into a sad post. I am not sure that was on purpose. I’ve just been thinking a lot about my old kiddos lately. And clearly, I’ve been re-watching My Little Pony, which is  never a clever thing to do when you are a little shaky emotionally. You might come across an episode like this one, that will completely knock you off your feet and make you replay the same song over and over.

“I’ll fly until the end of the sky, so I’ll be the one who doesn’t have to say goodbye”

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