I am giving the Shadow of Time, the last book in the Starstone Series, one final read through these days, preparing it for release. It is always hard, going over the pages of your heart, wondering how others will view it, once you let it fly. Wondering if you are making yourself clear, if you are tying up all the loose ends, if you are leaving the reader with too little information or too many explanations…
The Shadow of Time is a book that is very special to me, as it ends the series, and sums up the story that has been living inside me all of my life. Reading it again, for what must be the one hundred times, I still feel like I am wrapping up my world, writing myself out of this safe place, where I used to live, preparing the story to go on without me to keep writing it. With the Shadow of Time, no more words needs to be said. The story has been told.
I could keep telling it. I could write on these books, in this world, forever, but I chose not to. It has to end here. And it will. Once I read the last 25 pages, once more, I will have to let it go. I will be homeless, once more.
Which isn’t entirely true. I still have the Danish version of the Shadow of Time, Tidens Skygge, that I have to edit, as I want them released at about the same time. That does mean that since I have just spent the last week reading this book, and it should be over now, it isn’t. I have to read it again.
I cannot begin to describe how hard that is. Not only is the emotional strain of questioning every single word, wondering if it does the story right, extremely difficult, but knowing how it all ends and having to live through it twice within a very short time… It is draining.
Don’t get me wrong. I love this book. I love reading it. But the whole publishing process is always very straining.
Add to that, my cover artist and me have not worked out a cover just yet. We will, though. We always do. I just can’t really imagine what could be on this cover, to do this book justice. I will have to settle for something, though, eventually.
It is two am now, in Denmark. I could finish editing the book tonight, if I wanted to. The other nights, I have been sitting up until 4am. I work best at nights. I am not going to, though. That last chapter, will have to wait until tomorrow. I can’t do it tonight. I don’t want to be finished with this book for good.
And I don’t want to read it again, in Danish, either. I am not sure how that makes sense, but it does to me, right now. One thing I have learned, while writing, is that you have to put it away once in a while. Don’t edit too many pages without a break. You will lose focus and concentration. For me, I always end up getting caught up in the story, and I forget that I am supposed to check for typing errors or Microsoft Word messing up- it does that more than one would think… At least on my computer. But then again, I have been at war with this computer since I got it. That is another story though…
So, instead, I’ll just end this post with a picture of Baby Firefly, hiding in my new pink rose.
I know, the things I come up with, to keep me from wrapping up these books…