In Memoriam

Dear Janis

Once we decided that the Dark Mare team wanted to join in the Nikon European Film Festival competition, most eyes turned to me, as the appointed script writer. The subject was “everyday moments.”

For me, there is only one thing you can be sure that I do, every day, and that is taking care of my horses. But as I thought about it some more, and wondered what others might do that would qualify as an everyday moment, I realized that I could not make a film about everyday life, especially not about everyday with my horses, without including you.

*Here we go then, please watch it before reading on, because there will be spoilers.*

“You are beautiful, like a star. But this world has seen a thousand stars and only one of you.”

I wrote the first draft rather quickly and I was pretty terrified to submit it to the team. This is such a personal story for me, and the one thing I did not want to do, was sell you out.

Please accept this as a tribute, because that is what it is. The second I sat down and started writing this script, it stopped being about the competition and became about telling our story. About allowing myself to remember you.

Letting myself face you, once more, instead of trying to ignore how you are always there, at the edge of my subconsciousness.

I was sick when we shot it. You can tell in some of the shots, if you know me and know what to look for, and you can surely hear it on my voice, even though we did the voice-over two weeks later, when I could speak again. I never meant to play a part in our movie, except behind the camera, but once we settled on using our own horses, I had to do it, because I knew it would save a lot of time if I just handled them myself. Also, you know me, I don’t let others handle my babies…

They were perfect superstars, if I may say so myself. I love how we managed to make sure that the actor playing you, was completely ignored by all of my usually curious and friendly horses. How they did not see her… you. How they saw me, and I saw you, at all times, no matter what I did.

I would like to take a second to thank Amalie Hansen, Kenlen Held, Jonathan Barkou and Aston Merlin for going along with this project and letting me turn our short film into a memento for you. I can promise that I won’t be doing that again. It has been far too emotional for me.

Janis 2

I’ll stick to writing fantasy. And whatever else I am told to write.

Still, I am very happy with how it turned out. Don’t get me wrong, there is always something I would like to change or do different, or touch up on, but all in all… This is it.

“Wild Rose, we could not shelter you

But I wish I could have known how, the winter came to you”  

Forever,

V

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About Starstone

-Owned by horses. Writer, Photographer, Director, Musician.
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4 Responses to In Memoriam

  1. Absolutely beautiful and so moving. Thank you for sharing it with all of us.

  2. jen says:

    Beautiful and haunting and brave.

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